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27 Jan Challenge yourself to fall back in love with your husband this month with these 30 tips. Be a Mystery. Sure, knowing everything about each other is comfortable, but it's no recipe for romance, says psychologist Harriet Lerner, author of " Marriage Rules: A Manual for the Married and the Coupled Up.". 15 May We yearn for this connection, yet we often find it elusive. There are very specific things you can do to support connection with your partner. 1. Connect With Yourself. You cannot connect with your partner if you are disconnected from yourself. Connection with another happens when you are open and flowing. You start focusing on the negative things in your relationship instead of the stuff that made you fall for each other in the first place. The simple things we used to do to connect as husband and wife -- giggle over a glass of wine, kiss for no other reason than to feel each other's lips, make love sans one eye on the clock.

Each category is further divided into areas important to you and your Christian faith including Bible studydaily devotionsmarriageparentingmovie reviewsmusic, news, and more. Even the nicest homes need maintenance. They need to be cleaned, repaired, manicured and managed. In the same way, your relationships needs maintenance.

Because you cannot be perfect, there will be emotional meltdowns, communication faux paus and plain old mistakes in your marriage so you need to be good at recovering, recuperating and reconnecting. To help in the process of please click for source with your spouse, consider these ways of keeping your relationship in good shape.

Don't say a thing, just give her a hug, or squeeze his knee or pat his hand. Sometimes the best things in life are unsaid. One way to remember this principle is this little poem: To keep a marriage brimming with love in the loving cup -- When you are wrong, admit it and when you are right, shut up! Look How To Start Hookup Your Husband Or Wife Again a positive. Anything positive -- even, "Sure is nice weather today, huh? John Gottman and his colleagues have found that satisfied married couples had five positive interactions to every one negative interaction.

Decide to have a positive attitude and then positive words will flow from it. Look for something that is good. Say some word of affirmation. Bill often says things like, "That's ok, Pam.

I'd rather be here with you in this situation than with anyone else, any place else. Who cares if you can't cook if your husband calls you "One red hot mamma! Look for the humor. This is not the cutting humor that can slice a heart. Instead, look for the inside joke. In our surveys of couples who have long-term happy marriages, nearly everyone mentioned the need for a good sense of humor! King Solomon, known as the wisest man in history, says, "A cheerful heart is good medicine.

Keep it in perspective. Real problems are when someone has cancer or you've just lost a loved one. Everything else is just an obstacle to overcome. My friend, Debbie Andersen, a career military wife, gives young, stressed wives great advice when hit with a tough circumstance: We asked the long-term happily married couples in our survey their advice to newlyweds and a number of them used the same phrase, "Don't sweat the small stuff.

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Most often in a few hours from now it doesn't matter! I often ask, "If I do it Bill's way, is it immoral or illegal?

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Offer alternative suggestions and solutions. If things are really tense, you might want to hold your spouse for awhile then ask, "Are you ready to brainstorm some alternatives yet?

So in a tight spot when we didn't know what to do next one of us would ask, "What shall we do now? It gave us the opportunity to regroup, put our thoughts together and come up with a new plan or solution to the real issue. If your mate has a severe emotional meltdown, offer to take the kids to the park they probably want to escape too. Vacating the premises sometimes gives God some space to quietly work on your spouse.

God's healing and encouragement can be pretty powerful.

Remember, no husband has ever been shot while doing the dishes! Tap here to turn on desktop notifications to get the news sent straight to you. Are You a Target of Blame for a Narcissist? Instead, he hears criticism, the first of the Four Horsemen. Submitted by Jamie Long Psy.

Draw her a bath, light some candles, turn on some soft music and pray for her. Give him a safe place to escape and cool down. The garage, the tennis court, the golf course or the park to shoot some hoops might work to give him time to mentally regroup. Or, find a way to relax and take five together. Take a walk, go on a bike ride, or water the lawn. An interesting side note from the surveys of long-term married couples is many of them mentioned that buying a Jacuzzi was one of the best investments they made for their marriage.

One couple said, "We found out the silent treatment did not work, so we finally learned to http://hookupsvip.info/hookup-website/31003100u-dating-31003100t.php and share how we both felt. When we got our Jacuzzi, we would sit in it at night and share how our days went and talk about the things that bothered us before they became big issues. Hey, Look Over There!

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Offer up a distraction: The movies, a shopping trip, or lunch out. For many women, a trip to Starbucks for a read article, a stop at Crate and Barrel, some lotion from Victoria's Secret and any kind of chocolate might do the trick. For a man who is upset or angry, a trip to the batting cages to let him get his aggressions out might help a bit.

I saw a healthy pattern in my grandparents who were married for over 60 years. The more angry they were at each other the harder they would work. When grandma was really ticked the house became spotless. When grandpa thought grandma was unreasonable, a new barn might just go up! One counselor once said to us at a conference, "If you have to choose dysfunctions, choose workaholism over depression. At least you'll have something to show for it after the emotions are gone! If the emotional meltdown was your fault, apologize.

Recently, I helped one of my best friend's husband throw a surprise 40th birthday party for her. He was so stressed over trying to keep it a secret and hide all the details that he just wasn't acting himself. She got all mad in response. In the middle of an argument the night before, she drove off in a huff.

She was upset because she thought he wasn't going to do anything special for her birthday!

Not wanting to spoil the surprise he just took all the ranting, raving and emotions. He finally offered to take her and the kids to a nice dinner and the movies. To pull off the surprise he said they needed to stop by her friend's house on the way.

7 Ways to Create Connection With Your Partner

Well, when my year-old friend walked into her surprise party, she let out an excited gasp of joy. Then she immediately threw herself into her husband's arms and cried out an apology in front of her roomful of guests, "I am so sorry!

The bigger the faux paus, the bigger the apology should be. Guys learned long ago that candy, flowers and diamonds are a good way out of the doghouse. Remember, no husband has ever been shot while doing the dishes! So, if you lost it emotionally on your spouse try to think of a very sincere, very creative way to make amends.

10 Ways to Recover and Reconnect With Your Spouse

I don't know what the guy's mistake was, but I knew it had to have been pretty big when one day while driving down the freeway, I saw a huge white bed sheet with "I'm so sorry, Paula! I hope Source forgave him because that big a gesture is very rare.

Couples who let resentments build up find that even the smallest infractions can create major conflicts. If you find that any of these suggestions are hard for you, then do some inner work to discover what is in the way. Six months before we married, Bob came across a list I had never meant for link to see — my reasons for wanting to marry him.

It is not unusual for passionate couples to ride the emotional roller coaster of life together. Couples who choose to let the past reside in the past get a fresh start with each other regularly. Couples who let resentments build up find that even the smallest infractions can create major conflicts. You might be able to make a few points like the husband who proposed a toast to his wife at an anniversary party: To the two secrets for a long-lasting happy marriage: Here's to a good sense of humor -- and a short memory!

May we never forget what is worth remembering or remember what is best forgotten. Now, go reconnect with your spouse! This article is an adaptation of advice found in bookEvery Marriage is a Fixer Upper Harvest House They are the authors of over 20 books including best-selling, Men are like Waffles, Women are like Spaghetti. Devos of the Day. Marriage Who is Jesus?